TuscMoms.com

Good luck MMDM! We have tried different arrangements, and when I went back to school, which was a sacrifice for everyone in various ways, there was an expectation that afterwards I would work full-time (I expected that from myself too). But then #2 came along, and it wasn't the right time for tull-time work, and then when I did move to full-time, it just didn't work with the family. We had to figure out what worked best for us, and I think that's what everyone has to do. Sometimes it is trial and error, but you'll do it too!
And I completely know what you mean about loving your work. I love my work and also feel that it is an important contribution to the community, as well as an important part of who I am.
Again, good luck with finding the balance!

MMDM, I completely understand. Well said. That's how I feel about my work. It makes me a better mother and wife to fulfill my professional goals.

I am definitely taking a pay cut to work from home part time. But I wouldn't change a thing. Sometimes I think about the salary I used to make when I worked full time and think about all the things I could do with that money. But we are doing OK like this and I am home with my boy.

However, working from home is not as easy as I thought it would be. MMDM, you are smart to have a person come in and help you. I see that happening in my future. Especially when I have child #2. Either that or I'll have to find a place where Jack can go a few days a week.

I went back to work when my son was 6 weeks old, because I had to for the health insurance (among other financial reasons). I hated it and was miserable, but you do what you have to to take care of your family. Luckily, my MIL was able to watch Will and I felt a much better about leaving him with her than I would have if I had to put him in daycare.

A couple of months after I returned to work, DH's employer began to offer family health insurance plans that were much more affordable than what they had offered previously. So, Will and I switched over to his plan. My last day of work was at the end of December. We have had to make a lot of sacrifices for me to be able to stay home, but I think it's worth it. We do stress about money, but overall we under a lot less stress than we were before and are a lot happier.

If I would have worked a little longer, maybe we would have been able to pay off a few more bills, but for us it was sort of a "it's now or never sort of thing." I'm BFing and was never able to express enough milk for Will to drink while I was at work. So, his bottles were a mixture of BM and formula. I've been told a lot of women have problems with this, because the pump does not remove milk as well as a baby. So, my milk started to dry up. I took the herb fenugreek and also took two cycles of prescription drug, but it only helped a little and only while I was taking it. I kept having to put more and more formula in his bottles during the week and on the weekend he was nursing constantly, because my milk supply had gotten so low. So, we decided if I was going to quit, it had to be soon, before the milk was completely gone. If I hadn't stopped working before that happened, I would have had to keep working till Will was 1 year, to be able to pay for the formula. I didn't have a very high paying job, so when you add up the cost of formula, what we were paying my MIL, gas to get 2 and from work, etc I would have been working for almost nothing.

Something else I forgot to add- It seems that many people see all SAHMs (not just the poorer ones) as lazy. But you know what's funny- No one sees nannies, daycare providers, or preschool teachers as being lazy. So, It's Ok to make a full time career of caring for children, as long as you're being paid.

LOL!! How true SM! I guess only us moms know how much work it really is.

quote:

Originally posted by SarahMay:
Something else I forgot to add- It seems that many people see all SAHMs (not just the poorer ones) as lazy. But you know what's funny- No one sees nannies, daycare providers, or preschool teachers as being lazy. So, It's Ok to make a full time career of caring for children, as long as you're being paid.

That is totally whacky, SM! I never thought of it that way, and it's so wrong! Maybe I'll just call myself a nanny from now on!